It's not that serious

Disclaimers: the following post contains multiple, continuous and flagrantly shameless use of the words: fuck, bitch, and FAT If any of these words offend you or if you're one of my former English teachers please navigate away from this page now



Dear Ungrateful Fat Bitches,

WTF
nobody put's baby in a corner

I expected hate from the "mainstream" but from you. You're breaking my god damn heart. I knew when I started doing burlesque that I would have an uphill battle to fight but I can't believe you are trying to drag my ass down too. Oh you are flag waving for equality, bitching about how people treat you differently, crying about all that bullshit you went though in grade school but when it comes down to it sometimes you are just as much part of the problem.


Lets start with the thing that pisses me off the most. More than the fuck-me-never frumpy grey clothes you wear, the constant newest fad diets you go on, or the enabling support groups where you get together and cry. Lets start with this: The whole. utter and complete dismissal of yourself as a sexually potent human being...


I keep getting these response from other big women:
#1 We are about celebrating our curves not sexualizing them
#2What you are doing is perpetuating a harmful fetishism
#3 We deserve to be loved not put on embarrassing display


1
Ummmm... you lost me sweetness what better celebration of your curves, then covering it with glitter and dancing the night away.


2
The idea that my particular thunda thighs are floating her boat or rockin his cock doesn't break my flow sugah. It's not like I have to stand there and watch them do it to it. I'll pose for a picture for private use...and if they want panties that costs extra (you freaks know how to reach me ;) ) . Besides like someone pointed out to me the other day skinny women don't get pissed off that people find them attractive just because they are skinny. Or do ya'll?


3
I really wished you believed that... because if you did then you would not fall for prey to being what Kathryn calls the "grateful fat chick". I am not a grateful fat chick but I used to be. I was that fat girl that would be oh so happpy that someone was checking her out, asking her out, or calling her pretty. I was that fat girl that was content to let him touch her in private even if he didn't hold her hand in public. I was that fat girl that was starving for his compliments and hungrily eating all the bullshit he spit out. I am no longer a grateful fat chick... now I'm a phat bitch


I'm out there shaking my wide ass and jiggling my tits not just to appease my behemoth sized ego but to liberate you, reeducate the masses and fuck with the heads of fat-o-phobs. I'm fighting to be free in mind and expression. Yeah I'm taking my clothes off but if you look past that you'll see that I have the ovaries and intestinal fortitude to live my dream at my present size in my present body unapologetically and that is something that extends beyond the stage.

That's the real reason you fat bitches hate on me. I am shoving in your face what you want to run from most,what you cover up with girdles and cinch in with control top panties. Because you have not let go of your shame, and self loathing. Because someone beat you down so hard you are trying to beat me down too.

But I don't want to beat you down,
I don't want to embarrass you.
I want you to really see, to really accept how fabulous you are, how deserving you are how damn pretty you are.


And don't give me that it's so easy for you bullshit either. I went though it too, from sneak eating to starving, from depression so deep that I could not step outside... I'd binge and purge on self hate with side orders of hot steamy shame. I may not always be fat.. you may one day be skinny but we are ALWAYS human beings. And as human beings we have basics needs that are physical, spiritual, emotional, mental, sexual.

Because I believe fat bitches need love too
Because I believe that this phat bitch needs love too I refuse to let your fear, past rejections and negative reflections suppress my sexuality, my sensuality, my personality .


Nobody puts baby in the corner!!
Besides there is too much of me to even fuck around at pretending at being invisible.
All 5'6 279 pounds of me demands to be respected to be loved, to be touched, to be sexualized and fetish-ized and glamorized and seen for the powerful beautiful woman that I am.

so do me a favor
cut a bitch a break
and stop weighing me down with all your misplaced hate.




oh and Dr Phil... BITE ME!!

To all those men who told me the following thinking that it was a complement

-for a fat chick you are pretty/sexy/hot

-you're not like the other fat chicks I know

-I’ve never been into big women but I could get into you

FUCK U you goddamn moron. Do you honestly think my self esteem is so low as to need you to tell me shit I already fucking know?  Did you think that by telling me that I’m not like the “other fat chicks” you have some passing acquaintance with that I would feel all warm and fucking fuzzy and slide the pole?  Do you feel the same way about black people too?  I’m totally ordering an expensive dessert on your dime tonight you silly jackass.

FUCK U to

-Macys/ JCPennys/Sears for not only putting “Women” sizes in the basement near the draperies but also for carrying clothes so matronly that not even Margaret Thatcher would wear them

-Women’s magazines who have the “Latest Diet Secrets” right next to a recipe for “The World’s Best Chocolate Cake”.  Seriously…. wtf mate

-People at the gym that cut their eyes at me with either disdain or pity.  I need neither you condescending sons of bitches.

And finally to all the thick sisters, big girls, phat chicks, bbws, rubenesque rubies who walk around with their head bowed, feeling sorry for themselves, hidden under layers of grays and blacks and dresses that are shaped like feed sacks, waiting until they lose 10, 20, 50, 100lbs before they even attempt to remove themselves from their living dead state of mind.

A very, very empathic FUCK YOU!!

Because you’re not helping the situation either. 

So what if the media pressures you, your peers teased you, your mother called you fat growing up and you manifested it later in life.  Whether you are a size 10 and think you are fat or a size 30 and actually are. Own that shit!!

You sweetness are pretty and sexy and hot .  You can get the man/men or woman/women you want and you can trust me on that one ;)

Demand better, rise up, wear colors, take pictures, accentuate your bursting bosom, celebrate your round round ass, caress your thunder thighs as much as possible and encourage your lover or yourself to give you the tummy rub you so desperately need.   

Cause nobody is going to want you it you don’t want yourself

Cause nobody is going to see you if you don’t show yourself

I’m 5’6

I’m 287 lbs

I refuse to be invisible, stuffed into a box, labeled and listed among societies rejects, forced to I drop 137 more pounds before I can feel pretty and sexy and hot and fucking worthy of the life I want.

And you shouldn’t either.