Dear Mr. Vanilla ....

Dear Mr. Vanilla,

You know
like I think every one knows
that getting me is not the problem.

At least I think you know that getting me is not the problem.
I love everyone
really I do
It's a pain in the ass to be this way and maybe I shouldn't
but I always give everyone a chance unless they are idiots, fucktards, rat bastards, materalistic, smell bad or are in gerneral indecent human beings.

It is a life lesson for me to learn.  To be more selective.  To say no more often instead of yes yes yes YES!!!
but I digress.

This isn't about me it's about you.
So like I said "Getting me is not the problem"  but "keeping me" sure the hell is.

See at first I thought oh you have a diffrent relationship style than me and I need to learn how to work with that but then I thought about it and you know what... fuck it!  I'm an open book and I would like to be with an open book. 

For examle: If I ask your middle name I don't want to play a god damn guessing game. I want to know.  You had your dick in me I should at least be privy to your goddamn middle name!

Away digressing.

This elusive thing you are doing doesn't make you mysterious it makes you annoying. It's not making me reach for you or pay attention to you or try to open you up.  It is wearing on me, making me not want to hang around.
But you helped me realize somethings
~there are men out there who just want to make women feel good
~I need more than someone who has a job and a seperate life
~I need (a) spiritual partner(s) in my life
~I need (an) open partner(s) in my life
~It is correct for me to demand what I want
~It is incorrect for me to settle

And the more I'm getting to not know you the more I realize that I would be settling for you.
Because I am not willing
~defend my core belifes
~defend my sexual desires
~settle for a single partner
~jump through pyschological hoops.


So dear dear Mr. Vanilla I really like you but I guess its time we had a conversation .... fucking sigh