missrenie: (Default)
Fucking Yahoo

V
: you there?

Me
: hi hun!!! how are you?

V: will you do me a quick favor and take an IQ quiz for a project im doing?

Me
: omg I may fail... whats the project?
 
 
Bot?: I need to see how many people out of my friends get over a 115.

Me
:groovy is it for school?

Bot?
: just go to XXXXX and take the test.. if you do ill owe you big time.

Me
:no prob but I hate to be this way... its been so long and someone recently hacked my account and I wanna be sure that you are you and not a bot so if you answer this question I will do it: What was I called in the senor segment?

Bot
:im not hacked!

Me
:you are so hacked if you can't answer that question and im totally calling you right now and your sister to let them know

Dumb Ass Bot: please let me know what score you get. thanks so much


 
missrenie: (Default)

Chat Dude:     Stats

Me:                  ?

Chat Dude:     M/W/S/36/6’4/170, 10

Me:                  ?

Chat Dude:     male,white,single, 36 years old, six feet and inches, 170 lbs,

10 inches of pleasure for you.

Me:                  Don’t mess with me.  You’ll end up blogged.

Chat Dude:     blogged?

Me:                  Yeah blogged big time

Chat Dude:     Do you always threaten men like that?

Me:                  Yeah I threaten women that way too.

Chat Dude:     so what do you blog sexy?

Me:                  things that tickle or traumatize me

Chat Dude:     Can I tickle you?

Me:                  no, but that question is creepy and kind of traumatizing

Chat Dude:     You’re funny

Me:                  I’ve been told

Chat Dude:     i bet you have

Me:                  You’re sarcastic

Chat Dude:     i’ve been told

Me:                 I bet you have

Chat Dude:     what’s your stats

Me:                  this again?

Chat Dude:     what’s the matter r u shy.

Me:                  F/B/S/27/5’6/150/DD

Chat Dude:     Wow really J

Me:                  No, not really I lied about my weight

Chat Dude:     Are you a little chubby?

Me:                  No, I’m fat.

Chat Dude:     I like fat girls

Me:                  has that ever worked for you?

Chat Dude:     Is it working now?

Me:                  No

Chat Dude:     You’re the exception

Me:                  I’m glad

Chat Dude:     So when can I fuck you?

Me:                  When you speak to me with more than one sentence

Chat Dude:     So when can I fuck you?  Please?

Me:                  You’re kindah of charmingly single minded you know that?

Chat Dude:     Is it working?

Me:                  No

Chat Dude:     but I spoke 2 u in more than one sentence.  

Me:                  wow I guess that makes me a liar

Chat Dude:     you seemed like a good girl

Me:                  you don’t know me so you don’t know what I seem like

Chat Dude:     so are u  a bad girl… what bad things are you doing to yourself right now

Me:                  talking to you

Chat Dude:     really I’m hard for you now

Me:                  I’m at work

Chat Dude:     kinky, so am I

Me:                  okay g2g

Chat Dude:     you gonna leave me like this

Me:                  yep, good luck.

(switch to invisible… 5 mins later)

Chat Dude:     I know ur there. U were mean to me but you can make it up.

Me:                  I’m blocking you now.

Chat Dude:     you have a lot of making up to do

Me:                  lol

Chat Dude:     look don’t block me.  Let me send you a pic

Me:                  as long as it’s not of your penis

Chat Dude:     let me send you another pic

Me:                  you’re cute… I’m still going to blog you

Chat Dude:     did I tickle you J

Me:                  maybe

Chat Dude:     you know the size of my dick will traumatize you

Me:                  what are we 16?

Chat Dude:     I wanna get to know you

Me:                  get in line I wanna get to know me too

Chat Dude:     send me a pic

Me:                  no

Chat Dude:     but I sent you mine

Me:                  I didn’t ask for it

Chat Dude:     come on.  please.  see more that one sentence.

Chat dude:      wow you are fat but your beautiful

Me:                  jesus why am I still chatting with you

Chat dude:      using your word. you have a nice smile too.

Me:                  please don’t stoke off to that

Chat dude:      no promises… you are really cute. funny too

Me:                  I’ve been told

Chat dude:      I’m telling you again. I’d like to chat with you more.

Please?

Me:                  I’m not fucking you.

Chat dude:      You don’t know that yet.

Me:                  I’m serious…i'm wearing iron underwear and  I’m like a mountain. 

I shall not be moved

Chat dude:      Then I’ll be like the wind. 

Me:                  You’ve switched tactics.

Chat dude:      You’ve noticed.

Me:                  Don’t attempt to woo me with adult conversation

Chat dude:      Why is it your kryptonite.

Me:                  bah!

Chat dude:      Add me to friends please

Me:                  No

Chat dude:      Please?

Me:                  Fine

Chat dude:      I’ll stop bothering you now so you can get back to work. 

I hope to talk with you later

Me:                  I’m grumbling and rolling my eyes.

Chat dude:      that’s a good sign… have a nice day my fat goddess

Me:                   mother of christ your full of it

 

And so he disappears into the ether... 


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November 2011

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